When news broke yesterday that former Misfits main-man Glenn Danzig has filed a lawsuit against current Misfits captain, Jerry Only, a collective tut exhumed from the keyboards of fans worldwide. The news comes only months after Doyle – previous Misfits axeman – hinted at working on a classic-era reunion for the horror-punk icons. While this now seems about as likely as a pig dressing up as Alex from A Clockwork Orange and performing a contemporary dance routine, here's a few reasons why we want the classic Misfits to get back together and go kill again (after asking Mommy, of course).
IT WOULD STOP JERRY BUTCHERING THE DANZIG-ERA MATERIAL
To be fair, Jerry’s got a decent voice – his crooning on the latest Misfits album, The Devil’s Rain, is good enough. But when performing the early stuff live, the raw, unpolished aggression that Danzig brings to the table just can’t be matched, and the whole thing ends up sounding a bit like Pat Boone having a paddy. With Danzig back in the fold, it’d give Jerry the chance to do what he does best – bash his bass guitar to bits whilst looking buff as fuck.
IMAGINE DANZIG SINGING DIG UP HER BONES AND HELENA
The Misfits’ mid-period with Michale Graves is often looked upon with a certain degree of scorn, but the band penned some raging anthems during this time. Danzig’s baritone bark would fit like a fingerless leather glove on the Graves stuff (material from the American Psycho album in particular); the bloke can still nail it live, so to see him tackle unfamiliar territory would be a must-see.
ERIC ARCE SOUNDS LIKE HE’S FALLING ASLEEP ON HIS DRUM-KIT
Old age eventually grasps everyone within its unforgiving claws, but you don’t see Bruce Springsteen playing Born To Run in slow-motion, do you? Arce has been the loose-link within the Misfits for a while now; whether he’s unwell, unrehearsed or just a bit shit remains to be seen, but having him play the drums out of time is just not on. Robo would be the obvious choice to warm the stool, but even Dr. Chud would be a winner for fans.
DOYLE
The guy’s pushing 50 and he still looks like he could floor Mike Tyson with his eyes closed. Having completed a clutch of shows with Danzig last year – where Misfits songs were played by the duo – Doyle still has it in him to churn out the tunes. Plus, he’s unashamedly entertaining to watch – when was the last time you saw Dez Cadena punch the shit out of his guitar?
IF NEW MATERIAL SURFACED, THE LYRICS WOULD BE RIDICULOUS
The lyrics to Misfits ditties have always been horror-themed, but since Jerry took the reigns, it’s all gotten a little tame. With Danzig re-instated, his macabre twist on life (and death) could create more murderous sing-alongs to rival the likes of Last Caress, Skulls and Death Comes Ripping.
IT’D JUST BE REALLY LOVELY FOR EVERYONE TO GET ALONG
While having the classic-era members writing and performing together again would be incredible, nobody’s asking for a new album, nor is anyone asking for the band to top-and-tail in the tour bunks. It’d just be nice to see a genuinely legendary act have one last hurrah with its iconic line-up rather than have Jerry flog the Misfits horse until it’s died, risen again then died again.
IT WOULD HOPEFULLY PUT A STOP TO SHIT LIKE THIS
Jerry… mate. Why?
