What’s the most illegal thing you’ve ever done?
“I’d rather not say! I’ve done nothing wrong whatsoever… but I’m committing murder in my own head every day.”
What’s the most metal album in your collection?
“I don’t know if they’re considered the most metal band in the world, but Judas Priest’s Painkiller is pretty fucking metal. That’s one of my all-time favourites – it was the first album with their new drummer Scott Travis and that’s the kind of Priest I like!”
What’s the worst injury you have ever had?
“I had a herniated disc in my back once and I couldn’t walk for a year. I then went to another doctor and he gave me one muscle relaxer and I was fine. Why couldn’t the first guy give me those?! I just couldn’t believe that one little pill the size of a pinhead made such a difference. I have a couple more discs that are herniated in my neck but I’m not getting those fixed. I work out a lot on my stomach to help keep my spine protected.”
What’s the most you’ve ever been sick?
“What, in litres?! I ate bad watermelon once and that really sucked to throw up because watermelon’s so delicious! That’s the only thing I could continue to eat right after throwing it up. I’m always afraid to eat it now because it caught me once, but watermelon’s so friendly, it’s like, ‘Eat me, I’m fucking great!’”
What’s the grossest thing you’ve ever had in your mouth?
“I was eating Rice Krispies once when I poured out a bowl without looking and ate it. I looked in the box after and there was no cereal in there at all – it was all just little white flies with white wings. I finally realised I had just eaten a whole bowl of bugs so I started pretending it had never happened because if I’d registered it, I would have hurled. I always look in the box before pouring now but Rice Krispies are another friendly food – they look like they’re having a party in your bowl!”
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What’s the worst fight you’ve ever been in?
“I haven’t been in any really bad ones – they’re usually nothing too dramatic and over pretty quickly. Arguments with women are the worst I’ve ever had, but I don’t have that problem anymore.”
When was the last time you bled?
“Last night from playing guitar. It’s the same spot every single day – it’s just like shaving, how you keep cutting the same area. They’re pretty used to it by now, though; my finger cuts on my right hand heal a lot quicker than those on my left.”
What’s the rarest piece of merchandise you own?
“My guitars! I don’t collect anything, I don’t have many possessions but all I have is my equipment. I won’t collect any kind of bullshit – where am I gonna put it? It’s all going in the trash at some point.”
What’s your most painful tattoo or piercing?
“My guitar tattoo on my foot. We took a break by accident and when he came back and touched it with a paper towel, it felt like a sander on my foot! We had to do the most painful part after that and it made me howl like a bitch. I didn’t even care that the shop was full of people – I’m not gonna pretend I’m a tough guy because this shit hurts! The same artist did Alissa’s [White-Gluz, Arch Enemy, Doyle’s girlfriend] tattoo for a 9-10 hour sitting and she didn’t even flinch. I was screaming like a bitch!”
What’s the most metal picture on your phone?
“Any picture of Alissa and I!”
Final Score: 6⁄10
Not a mind-blowing showing from the horror punk legend (romance isn’t metal, sorry pal), but he did skull a box of bugs.
As We Die is out now via Monsterman
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