The internet's brilliant, isn't it? Obviously it's not without its dark side; that place where people spend literal hours of their life arguing the toss about Brexit, Donald Trump and other fundamentally depressing and divisive world events. But that's not what the internet's founding guardians wanted us to use it for, oh no. As everyone who's ever used the internet knows, it was invented so we could look at pictures and videos of lovely, cute animals.
Quite often, we here at Louder spend hours of our personal time watching videos of cats on YouTube. Classic Rock's online editor Fraser Lewry has even written a book on kittens. Obviously, it’s impossible to watch all of the internet's cat content – and how we tried – but here we've gathered the best of literally billions of heavy metal-and-pet-related videos on the world wide web.
Slayer kitty
Now, it’s not often that you associate Slayer with relaxation, or cuteness, or, y'know, anything nice, but this pet is clearly perfectly happy to kick back and watch the thrash legends in concert. Perhaps they’re watching Dave Lombardo for some drumming tips, as at 36 seconds, their foot twitches with the speed and dexterity of the former Slayer stickman’s right foot. Handy when upping the ante on songs like Postmortem. Although this cat can’t speak, everything suggests that their favourite song is either Aggressive Purrfector or Catatonic.
Megadeth kitty
Many Megadeth fans will argue that their 1990 release Rust In Peace remains their best album, but this cat disagrees. While most cats are content to sleep or chase ghosts around the house at 4am, this pet was practicing Dave Mustaine’s growl on the title track of the 1986 album, Peace Sells… But Who’s Buying? You can really feel the disdain during the line, ‘What do you mean, ‘I can’t get to work on time’? I got nothing better to do’. Really capturing the gripes of your everyday feline, there.
Death metal kitties
Look at these cats. They’re definitely not yawning, but capturing the eternal torment of any death metal vocalist you care to name. What troubles these young minds? They’ll never know where that red spot on the wall went and it’s really becoming an issue.
Limp Bizkitty
Let’s take things down a notch now. This cat clearly doesn’t care for this piano cover of Limp Bizkit’s cover of The Who’s Behind Blue Eyes. It patiently watches its owner for a while but quickly gets bored and attempts to add some jazz flourishes at the end. This cat is clearly a fan of Dream Theater’s Jordan Rudess, but lacks the technical flair. Don’t worry, that will come in time.
Disappointing melodic death metal kitty
We have no idea what prompted the cat below to dish out a slow massage to some melodic death metal. Come on, mate, you’re letting the side down.
Send us any and all pics of your cats doing anything at all cute, funny or heavy metal-worshipping on Twitter!
