If anyone knows a thing or two about horror, it’s Rob Zombie. Over the course of his career, the solo star has sung about every freaky IP you can imagine, not to mentioned delved into the genre himself as a decorated director. Oh, yeah, and his name is Rob bloody Zombie.
As a result, Zombie’s thoughts on the genre he loves beyond all else carry some serious weight. So, in 2014, Revolver sat down with the musician-cum-filmmaker and got him to name the five worst films that have ever (dis)graced the face of horror. He said his number one was Dracula 2000, and did not hold back when it came to tearing the flick a new one.
“This may be the worst movie ever committed to film,” Zombie declared right out the gate. “I found every single thing about it to be offensive, from top to bottom. You just stare at it in shock.”
The former White Zombie man continued, getting deep into his grievances with the vampire dud. “I especially hate the fact they drop a Virgin Megastore product placement in the film every 10 seconds. It’s just the most disgusting piece of shit I’ve ever seen. Dracula is a tough character to play, you’ve got to really bring something to the table, and I don’t even remember the guy in this movie. Everything about this movie is complete horse shit.”
For those of you who don’t know, Dracula 2000 was released in guess-what-year and gave itself the ridiculously hard task of imagining a sequel to Bram Stoker’s Dracula. You know, the most venerated, imitated and iconic vampire novel of all time? That one.
The film was executive-produced by Scream/A Nightmare On Elm Street legend Wes Craven, but that’s where the involvement of proven horror talent started and ended. Up to that point, director Patrick Lussier’s highest calling had been editing Craven’s New Nightmare in 1994. Gerard Butler starred as a Dracula who stalks modern America, after apparently somehow surviving his stabbing, decapitation and crumbling to dust at the end of the book. We don’t blame Zombie for forgetting the lead actor, as he turns in one of the worst performances of his career across those 99 minutes.
As you’ve likely guessed by now, Dracula 2000 was released to a critical dismembering, with one review calling it the worst indignity ever suffered by the title character. It also died at the box office, making $47 million off a $54 million budget. Not even a vampire could survive that skewering, with the franchise limping on as a series of pathetic direct-to-video sequels before perishing in 2005.
If there’s one nice thing to be said about Dracula 2000, though, it’s that it was a product of that post-The Crow era where blockbusters crammed their soundtracks with alt-music legends. Disturbed, Slayer, Linkin Park, System Of A Down and more made the cut, which is as stacked as stacked could get when it came to metal at the turn of the millennium. In fact, the only major name missing was Rob Zombie – and he’s probably grateful every passing day that he wasn’t involved.
