IF YOU COULD PLAY GUITAR IN ANY BAND FOR A DAY, WHICH ONE WOULD YOU CHOOSE?
“Jeez, I don’t know. It’d probably be Godspeed You! Black Emperor. I wouldn’t even need to play with them. I’d just like to watch them for a day and see how they do their thing. They’re one of my favourite bands of all time, and I absolutely love what they do. I love the building, sawing, gnawing, musical view they have of the world and, more than any other band, I think they transcribe visuals into sound. So I’d love to play guitar with them. Or if we were to step outside of bands, I’d love to play guitar with [American avant-garde composer] John Zorn on a project, to see what he does. Both those acts are still alive and working, so maybe dreams will come true through this article…”
IF YOU COULD ONLY SAVE ONE STAGE COSTUME IN A FIRE, WHICH ONE WOULD IT BE?
“The most expensive one is the one that has all the lights over it, so I’d save that. A lot just get thrown away after tours because they smell too bad to keep, and they’re not washable. Most of them are like festering, disgusting roadkill. I’ve tried drying them out in the sun for months. I left something out for a year once, and it still smelt bad. So a lot of them just have to go. But I still have the clear white, kind of jellyfish light armour one, and all the computers that ran it tucked away.”
DID YOU EVER DRESS UP WITH MARILYN MANSON DURING YOUR TIME PLAYING WITH HIM?
“No, sadly not. That whole time was just kind of funny. It was more entertaining for me to get to see inside that whole world. It was entertaining, and simultaneously inspiring, and also a letdown at the same time. That guy is one of the funniest, quickest-witted people I’ve ever met, but he really needs to be healthier. He needs to start working on his inner organs and stop abusing them so much, because they’re going to fail him.”
HOW WOULD YOU DESCRIBE FRED DURST TO AN ALIEN?
“Um, I don’t think I’d be in a position to be able to describe anything, because I think we’d all be toast if aliens landed on Earth. And I don’t think they’d have any interest in doing anything except stripping our planet for raw material. Plus, I don’t speak the language anyway. We’d be done for!”
WHO’S THE MOST INSPIRATIONAL PERSON YOU’VE EVER MET?
“Carré Callaway [his fiancée, and singer of Queen Kwong]. She’s my inspiration. I look up to her in all kinds of ways, even though she’s younger than I am. She’s something else – as she sits glaring at me while blowing her nose…”
CARE TO ELABORATE? ESPECIALLY IF SHE’S IN THE ROOM…
“She’s the person that I want to spend the rest of my life with, and no one else. There’s book smarts and there’s street smarts, but then there’s this other thing that she has. She’s tied to something that I’m not even sure I know how to describe. She kind of just knows stuff. And I’ll say no more about that.”
YOU LOST US, ANYWAY… WHO’S THE MOST FAMOUS PERSON IN YOUR PHONE BOOK?
“Oh gosh, I’m trying to think. Probably Trent Reznor…”
FRED DURST IS MORE FAMOUS THAN TRENT REZNOR, SURELY?
“I think I’ve got Tommy Lee in there, actually. I don’t think I’ve ever called him, though. We exchanged numbers one time and maybe texted five minutes later to say, ‘Yeah, dude! Great to meet you.’ And then that was it. God knows how many years ago that was. Tommy is the forever kid, though. He’s awesome! I’ve never met a more positive person than Tommy Lee. He’s positive about everything and everyone, and just happy to be wherever he is. And he builds rollercoasters indoors.”
HOW MANY CATS DO YOU AND CARRÉ OWN NOW?
“Six – and still counting.”
AND IF YOU COULD BE ANY ANIMAL, WHAT WOULD YOU BE?
“I would be a sloth. Goodnight.”
WES BORLAND’S SOLO ALBUM, CRYSTAL MACHETE, IS OUT NOW VIA EDISON SOUND. QUEEN KWONG’S GET A WITNESS IS OUT NOW VIA DISSENTION
