Ever wondered what home improvements Kurt Cobain and Chris Cornell might undertake if the two deceased rock legends were to wind up sharing an apartment in the afterlife? Or, more specifically, have you ever mused upon which colours of paint the former frontmen of Nirvana and Soundgarden might choose were they to decorate an imaginary shared home in heaven? We're going to go out on a limb here and predict that your answer to both questions here is a hard 'No', because to do so would be pretty fucking weird, right? And yet this is the angle that a British paints company has chosen to promote their imminent launch of a new product range.
According to the press release we received today, YesColours’ new Dirty Collection, set for launch on February 1, is "a rebellious set of earthy paint colours that extend a gentle wink to the mighty colour wheel in all its glory." Good stuff. But wait, there's more...
"These hues are our grunge heroes with a sexy AF personality," the press release continues, much to our delight, because up to now sourcing paint with a "sexy AF personality" was proving to be a real ball-ache if we're perfectly honest.
Do tell us more, ad agency friends!
"We firmly believe that if Kurt Cobain and Chris Cornell were to decorate their shared home in heaven, they would use nothing else but our Dirty Collection."
Really? Really? That's a belief you hold strongly, is it? A hill you'd be prepared to die on? I mean, you do you huns, but it does seem like a bit of a stretch, respectfully.
But do carry on.
"As we embrace all of the emotions in our homes, these muted paint colours are sure to create a brooding atmosphere, even if it’s a little unconventional."
Okie dokie. Gotcha.
Now, to be fair to YesColours, there is a connection between the early '90s grunge explosion and paint. If Kurt Cobain and Bikini Kill's Kathleen Hanna hadn't teamed up to spray-paint the words 'fake abortion clinic' and 'God Is Gay' on the walls of a teen pregnancy centre in Olympia, Washington in August 1990, and then got utterly wasted together to celebrate their successful graffiti protest, then Hanna might never have scrawled the phrase 'Kurt smells like Teen Spirit' on Cobain's bedroom wall, and Nirvana's lead single from Nevermind might have emerged with an entirely different and possibly less intriguing title.
Might the pair have liked to have had the option of choosing between Dirty Red, Dirty Peach and Dirty Yellow paints for their spirited act of rebellion/vandalism? Who among us can honestly say for sure?
But still, with all that said, it's still fucking weird YesColours. Even if your palette is, as you claim, inspired by "real-life experiences, food and music", and part of your stated mission "to open up colour to everyone".
By the way, do tell Kurt and Chris that we just love what they've done with the place... heavenly!
